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December 04, 2008
American Airlines To Begin Charging Special Fees to Non-Passengers
American Airlines, working hard to return to profitability after years of being buffeted by high fuel costs, has announced a series of special fees on past customers as well as names chosen randomly from phone books, including a $30 surcharge on folks who have decided to stay at home during the upcoming holiday season.
Naw, just kidding.
That's just one part of the best phony news story I've seen in The Onion in a while.
In a terrific send-up of the onslaught of fees most airlines are charging these days, the satirical newspaper quotes the president of American Airlines, Gerard Arpey as saying, "Unfortunately tough times mean tough measures."
That means charging every non-passenger with a suitcase in their closet $15 and a random charge of $40 of every person in the US whose first name is Greg. And that's just the beginning. Read it and weep--or laugh out loud--here.
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Comments
Isn't The Onion great? They even managed to keep their sense of humor in late 2001. While everyone (myself included) was extremely upset and somewhat panicked, they managed to find some humor to lighten our moods. Here in New York, that wasn't easy to accomplish, but I remember managing to chuckle a bit at their efforts--and that was a wonderful moment of relief.
Posted by: Jess | Dec 6, 2008 1:27:32 PM
You have to wonder if the Airline execs didn't go to the same business schools as the auto execs. Both, seem to know how to deliver a mediocre product and alienate their customers at the same time. What a group.
Posted by: Josh | Dec 8, 2008 9:14:23 PM
United Airlines now charges $175 for a carry-on bag--oh, yeah, that's because it has a cat inside. So, yeah, American Airlines may be charging for non-passengers but United is now charging for bags. You could maybe say that the cat is a passenger, except then it would have a whole seat to itself, wouldn't it?
Posted by: Virginia | Jan 2, 2009 10:41:38 AM
