The Funniest Holiday Card of 2009? iPhone Apps For Parents With Young Kids!

My Minnesota-born friend, Doug Lansky, lives with his wife, Signe, and three young children in Stockholm, Sweden, where he's a widely-published author and travel journalist--he's the guy behind the "Signspotting" feature you may find in your local paper once a week.  For years, he's been distributing the funniest signs that mangle English that travelers send him from points around the world, and his third edition of the book, Signspotting III, was published this summer.

For Christmas this week, the Lansky family's holiday card (from Doug, his wife and their three children, Belieze, Sienna, and India) is a parody of those ubiquitous iPhone magazine ads, the ones that tout popular apps.  Except Doug and his wife played off the household havoc three kids can create by imagining some useful apps such as iScream: "Never thought you'd turn into a yeller, did you?  Keep calm and let this app amplify everything you say by 100X-, and it comes with safety earphones for user."

Or there's the Who Started It? app: "India did it. No, it was Belize's fault.  Sienna started it.  On one hand, who the f---- cares.  On the other, you need to be fair and make sure you're lecturing the right kid. Finally, a simple lie detector app that can help."

Then there's the Stop Hitting Your Sister app that allows you with the touch of a button to have your iTouch or iPhone repeat that question over and over while you pursue more leisurely and pleasant activities.

I thought his parody was so clever, I asked Doug for permission to reproduce it here.  He agreed, and while I  admit having young children around the house really helps make a holiday a great holiday, there isn't a parent among us who, every once in a while, wouldn't long for some of the handy apps the Lanskys imagined in this, their Christmas plea to Stephen Jobs and his programmers.